“We’ve got a crazy on our hands.”

The Car (1977) is an exercise in “just go with it” for both the cast and the audience. Every single one of us knows that this movie doesn’t make a single lick of sense, but we must commit! We must commit to the idea that Evil—or perhaps The Devil himself!—has chose to manifest as a bitchin’ car to drive around, honk a lot, and terrorize a small desert town for a while. Sure, why not. I mean, in the grand scheme of all things Heaven and Hell, I guess it’s not the most ludicrous tale, right?

Besides, it’s not hard to commit when it’s such a (cough) fun ride. James Brolin rides a motorcycle! His girlfriend paints his portrait! Kim and Kyle Richards are there, and as they were in Devil Dog: A Hound of Hell and Halloween respectively (not to mention, of course, their time as Real Housewives of Beverly Hills) their very presence elevates The Car to the realm of must-see. It’s fascinating to clock all the ways director Elliot Silverstein tried to muster up some tension and horror out of this scenario, and even if you’re never particularly scared, it kinda works. The fact that this li’l town is full of characters and their various dramas gives the film a wee more weight than you might anticipate, and makes the quieter moments as enjoyable as all the vroom vroom-honk honk sequences.

Or maybe I’m just high on SHOCKtober vibes with this official kickoff to the season! Nothing wrong with that either. Either way, The Car has done donuts on my heart.

I gotta say, all these posters make the movie look absolutely terrifying

Someone remade the film trailer entirely within the video game GRAND THEFT AUTO V and it’s pretty great

OF COURSE that old SFX album is on YouTube! I listened a little and it’s hilarious that the haunted house is so busy…there’s a cacophony of sounds happening, like ghosts and cats are running around yelling and slamming doors and rattling chains while a hurricane blows outside.

Talk about your trashy unauthorized biographies…Jerry Oppenheimer’s HOUSE OF HILTON: FROM CONRAD TO PARIS: A DRAMA OF WEALTH, POWER, AND PRIVILEGE is primo. I mean, there are TWO semicolons in the title. An important work!

I love that in a few decades this could probably be a moment from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, except the woman on the left would be Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle would be on the phone with Lisa Rinna